this is christmas

here is my new favourite song this Christmas.  thanks B! :) it is Christmas in a nutshell.  it's been on constant replay in my home as i wrap up the last minute preparations.  like too many times to count.  the lyrics are beautiful.  i come away every time thinking "yep, this is Christmas". love it, love it, love it...
hope you love it too...

then this....another "this is Christmas" moment for me.  thanks D! when i first saw this story i was again struck by the things that matter most in life.  not the packages.  not the trappings and glitter of the season.  it's love, it's family, it's lasting Hope.  and it's a happy ending for a change too...enjoy!

also, sending love and prayers to those we know who have recently lost loved ones. it must be so difficult at this time of year.  wishing you peace and comfort during these especially hard days.

i'm taking a blog break and will find my way back here in a few weeks.

merry Christmas, friends and family! i truly love you and count you all as some of my finest blessings!

#3

gotcha day #3 for Alemayehu Jeffrey. 

 

he was so excited about his new t-shirt...and happy to wear it to school and show Ethiopia's flag.

 

and cake is a giant highlight for AJ too.  takes after his mom...somehow...

 

i'm crazy blessed by this boy. he is sweetness and affection and joy and giggles. yesterday marked the anniversary of the day we rolled into AJ's life~ and he into ours~ forever. it is always emotional, always special, and never without loads of gratitude to see the healthy boy who now graces our home with love and laughter. 

i briefly looked back here and here to relive those early moments, and it's amazing how the details take me right back to the same feelings of those beautiful first days. then, last evening we looked through the photo album of his journey.

 

happy 3rd Gotcha Day, AJ!  so so so happy we did....

 

been thinkin'

i have some holiday thoughts whirling around in my brain these days.  it is just 15 days 'til Christmas, after all.  i thought i'd share with you.  click on the links if you are interested...

every Christmas i love these two Christmas classics.  well, not classics in the "classic" sense, but more "80's" classic...sung by bigtime artists with big hair and crazy lifestyles.  even still, the lyrics are thought provoking.  if only we all (including me...so easily side tracked) considered some of the basic truths in these songs 365 days a year...the first, "Do They Know It's Christmastime" was recorded by Band Aid, the British group Bob Geldof put together in 1984.  members of Band Aid included Bono, Phil Collins, David Bowie, Paul McCartney, and Sting. the single raised about $8 million for famine relief in Ethiopia.  Second, in 1985 the USA For Africa project was inspired by Band Aid.  "We Are The World" was a benefit single for victims of famine in Africa. It raised over $60 million, which was distributed to Ethiopia, Sudan, and other impoverished countries.  i've included an updated version of that song, created after the earthquake struck Haiti. wow, are the artists ever varied and talented~ some people can really sing!!  Wyclef Jean is Haitian, so it's fitting that he closes the song.  anyway, these songs touch me.  maybe in part because of the era they symbolize, but even more because of their relevance today.

finally, thinking about these families, this town, this tragedy.  still so raw, still so broken.  pray for Newtown this weekend...

on a happy note, did you hear about this? seems to be all over the news. call it shameless advertising, call it genius marketing, but whatever you call it, i still find it incredibly sweet and soooo fun. i wish i worked for WestJet and had been part of pulling off this Christmas surprise. pretty brilliant, i'd say...

now, off to work on making supper...

 

random, but blog-worthy

it's been a really busy few weeks.  lots of things underway, not to mention Christmas coming very quickly! so, a few quick pics to capture moments i especially loved.  the first, my "know-it-all" youngest three on the day i got in the van with my new phone.  they (even AJ!!) were firing off phone tips left and right, as if they owned one of their own.  "no, try it this way..." or "push that button, Mom" or "hold it down"....sheesh, when did i get so old??  it felt as if they were my own personal Samsung Technical Support team, all under the age of 10, and as if i was doing rocket science.  crazy, and humbling.  so, needless to say, they are my first picture (and wallpaper on my phone...i think it's called wallpaper...) and i felt they deserved to be considering they helped me close all the little start-up windows and tips just to get the clear screen for a camera shot to be taken.  wow.  it's that bad.

 

Last Friday AJ proudly entered the van with last week's spelling test...never disappoints.  "Mom, i only got one wrong!!!"  precious, precious, precious....how i'll miss this.  click on the picture if you need to enlarge it~ that i do know! :)

 

 

first highschool wrestling tourney of the season.  Joelle, Hannah and Adam competed.  this tournament allows bantam level entries, so Adam was allowed to wrestle kids of similar weight even though being in grade seven.  all three had fun and showed character and growth.  great outing and team building time for St. Clair as well. 

 

i feel the need to add here that in all photos the opposing wrestler is not experiencing any pain or shortage of oxygen.  the "head and arm" move below holds both the head and arm which prevents a choke, and at any moment the wrestler could also tap the mat to alert the referee and end the hold if discomfort exists. there, that's clarification for all the non-wrestlers and it's just important to know about the sport as well! :)

 

 

Layla and i enjoyed a half-school-day last week by baking muffins and cheddar biscuits to add to our soup meal that evening.  we figured we'd live on the wild side and cut out some Christmas tree shapes.  aren't we crazy? they were yummy!

 

during the baking session, Hudson and AJ came into the kitchen and announced that AJ now knew how to tie his shoes.  Hudson has taken it upon himself to teach his brother.  it wasn't exactly fully successful, but the basic steps were there with some direction from the "just about ready to burst as i watch" older brother....so sweet!

 

last, but certainly not least~ worthy of mention is the SEMC team that is serving in El Salvador this week.  a team of fifteen people from our church family partnering with God make an eternal difference.  feel free to follow their blog with me.  you don't even have to know them to catch their excitement for what they are seeing and experiencing there this week.  so good....

'tis the season

i love Christmas.  i always have.  best holiday ever, in my opinion, with Thanksgiving coming in at second place.  Christ's miraculous birth in Bethlehem and the peace, hope and joy that brings to my every day life, well~ it is sooo worth celebrating...God's love came down into our world and changed my eternity...."because of His great love...."  wow...that mind blowing detail can get lost amidst the hustle and bustle and noise and chaos and planning, but what is Christmas without this??

my mom made Christmas awesome when we were kids.  my dad was a willing and happy participant, but there was no doubt that the details of making our family Christmases memorable went to my mom.  she enjoyed it so much.  she still does.  dad earned the money to pay for these "details".  no surprise there, someone had to bring in the pay cheque.  much the same in our house now, actually.  i'll never forget the year i convinced my mom to bump up our gift-giving night (we usually did it on or close to Christmas Eve, but sometimes it was a few days before then) because of the unbearable anticipation i was experiencing.  she agreed, with not too much convincing even, which i remember being surprised by.  i think it was the year i received the prized Easy Bake Oven.  i still have lots of other standout memories too.  i remember stringing popcorn and cranberries for the live tree, baking and consuming loads of Christmas treats, Christmas Eve church services together by candlelight, decorating our home, anonymous giving to those in need, hours of music by Nana Mouskouri and Evie (i was always in awe of how pretty Evie was...and the Christmas season wasn't official until Come On Ring Those Bells was playing loudly on a Saturday morning with me perched by the big box speakers...) belted out from the record player or the tape recorder.  i remember receiving cherished gifts, board games played, late nights with time together by the crackling fireplace...etc....more than ever, i'm thankful for a blessed childhood including wonderfully simple and predictable holidays that shaped me profoundly for these later years.  and to even have the motivation to continue some of these same traditions for my own kids based on the joy and stability it brought to my life, year after year...wow, it was like a gift i didn't even consciously know i was receiving every. single. year.  nothing packaged, nothing purchased~ yet still the best gift parents can ever give their kids.  and i married a man with the same feelings about Christmas and his childhood memories.  his part in his memories may have been a bit more devious, however...because i know for certain i never went into my parents' closet and snooped at my presents early by unwrapping already wrapped presents and then proceeding to play with the unwrapped toys before putting them back in their packages and re-wrapping them at the end of the evening while his parents were out of the house.... :) (who does that!?!?!) but still, there was stable and consistent love and warmth and traditions in his home too.  another priceless gift given to a happy son.  oh, and not to mention the huge dose of grace considering his parents didn't cancel presents altogether that year....

so, as we dive into the busyness of this coming month, i'm remembering the Christmases past that formed the very way i perceive this amazing holiday.  I'm thankful for Boney M and the classic, timeless CD (favourite one of all time!!!) that reminds me of Mary's Boy Child, the tiny baby, the newborn King born from humble beginnings into a wooden stable with livestock , who grew to become a man who then made the Ultimate Sacrifice for all of mankind.  i'm so undeserving~ yet forever grateful...for both the Giver and the Gift this holiday season.

Merry Christmas!

aj quote

lately, AJ is surprising us with random facts about our world.  he's becoming a bit of a walking encyclopedia, of sorts.  (by the way, can you believe they aren't in use anymore???  volume after volume, obsolete, no longer needed...blame the World Wide Web for that one...i'm probably the only one to admit this, but i miss them.  that and film in my camera.  miss that too.) back to the topic...yes, AJ is listening in class.  that is a fact.  Mrs. Ferguson clearly has his attention, long enough at least to retain some bits of information he tucks away in his brain to share with me sporadically through the day.  here's just an example of what i learned from him last week~ all in one day...

first thing in the morning as i woke AJ for school.  he stretched and moaned and hadn't even fully opened his eyes when this gem was shared...

AJ:"mom, do you know what the biggest waterfall is?"

Me: "no, actually i don't.  can you tell me?"

AJ:"yep, it's Sandia."

Me: "Sandia? hmm..." i was thinking, but not saying what i was thinking because he was so emphatic and sure.  Hannah came in to greet him, and i had AJ tell her what he'd told me.  Hannah mentioned Angel Falls (in Venezuela) and AJ had definitely heard of this as well.  i determined to get to the bottom of "Sandia". and, lo and behold, the Sandia waterfall does exist in the Sandia Mountains, found in Albuquerque, New Mexico.  daddy found it first on his iphone.  pretty little waterfall, hey? (i wouldn't be mad to visit there someday.  you know, if i won such a trip. because that could happen twice. sigh....)

 

 

no, it definitely isn't the largest or tallest waterfall, but it does really exist.  oddly, when i questioned his teacher about this she said she hadn't taught about the Sandia Mountion waterfall or even known of its existence.  so, basically, i think AJ may have gotten lucky on that one, but the wide-eyed look of true sincerity has me slightly doubting even that theory.

 

later, in the afternoon as we drove to pick up the girls from wrestling practice...

 

AJ: "hey mom, why can't you see air?"

Me: "umm...good question, but i don't know an easy way to explain it.  you just can't see it!"

AJ: "you just can't see it because it's blank!"

Me: "oh, true."

AJ: "do you know who the first person was to step on the moon?"

Me: "yep, i do!" (happy to finally know the answer to a six year old's questions but resisting the urge to blurt it out) "do you know, AJ?"

AJ: "yes, Mr. Armstrong."

Me: "good job, buddy! but not the husband of your SK teacher, Mrs. Armstrong.  a different Mr. Armstrong.  Neil Armstrong."

AJ: "oh, Neil Armstrong."

 

wow, that's alot in one day!  not to mention all the other little announcements about space and the planets and rotation of the earth around the sun, etc...on other days.

this is the stuff i'll miss when my children are all grown.  not the hard questions, specifically, but the beauty of seeing the world through their eyes as they begin to learn about it and comprehend its workings.  not to mention the grade-1 refresher course i'm getting~ that's always good too.  

 

throwback

throwback photos...in random order...i just came across many of them this week and man, did they ever take me back.  back through years of memories.  years of daily life during both the highs and lows...so bittersweet, if i'm honest.  i won't ramble about it.  lucky you! :) i'll just post the pics...

below, Joelle, happy with a book, fireside at our old house...i will show her this...ahem...

 

Hudson sick for the first time after arriving home.  he was mad at the bowl we kept putting near his face when he started to show signs of retching.  he tried to push it away.  he was honestly convinced the bowl was making him throw-up. it was understandable and pretty cute even.

 



 

 Adam, loving his new brother so sweetly.  i think we were all stunned to see Hudson crashed on the floor.  we knew it had to be bad when he stopped moving.

 

Layla~ antics on the toilet.  that expression was foreshadowing of more amped-up antics to come.  oh yes....

 

Adam and Hudson, on my unmade bed :)

Hannah in her element with Ethiopian friends.  we sooo miss them still. taking our girls on that trip is definitely one of my lifetime highlights.

Harvest Party~ Hannah, back when she took a turn finding candy in the leaf pile.  now she helps with the game while the younger kids experience the fun of it.

Layla, loving the chocolate.  nothing has changed.

 

day 1 with Hudson in Haiti.  he wasn't so sure about us yet, but we were so sure about him.

 

AJ's first experience with whipped cream and cream puffs.  total love of anything pastry ever since.  can't say i blame him. 

 

orphan related

November is National Adoption Month, and this past Sunday was Orphan Sunday.  we recognized this day at our church, the SEMC.  the subject is heavy, i mean, really~ who can even fathom the statistic of 153 million orphans worldwide.  gulp....i know i can't.  another statistic~ 30,000 children in Canada alone waiting for a forever family.  bru-tal...it's too much at times, too large, too daunting.  it's easy to feel discouraged.  really easy.  yet, there is this unmistakable biblical call to action that spurs us on.  God's heart bends for the orphan, it's mentioned many times in His word.  this stuff isn't my bright idea.  it isn't even the scheme of the Orphan Care Ministry or the church as a whole.  it's God's clear and concise instructions, straight from the pages of the Holy Bible.  over and over again.  that's not to say that every person is meant to adopt, or foster, or travel to a far off place to visit orphans in their distress.  not at all.  no, we are all equipped differently.  adoption is not for everyone.  fostering isn't either.  but everyone can do something.  there are endless options not already mentioned.  prayer, child sponsorship, volunteering with a local CAS, supporting organizations that help both alleviate the orphan crisis and halt it's further growth, etc...there is much to do.  many little lives depend on our action.  i've added a couple links.  they are powerful and inspiring~ a combination of truths that cover the topic well, better than i could.

Eric Ludy~ Depraved Indifference
Orphan Sunday 2012 clip
Creation Groans

a moment to pause, and an aj quote

i have to pause before i go further...today, as i sit to type my weekly entry into our family diary, my heart is feeling a bit heavy.  one of the faithful visitors to this corner of cyber space, a dedicated reader of this humble blog (one of you 12! :)) is no longer reading.  my mom's dear uncle, Ome Jan, passed away last week after a period of deteriorating health.  he was 85 years old.  this man was special.  he was soooo loved.  i spoke about him here on his last birthday.   i'm so blessed to have known him.  my mom cared deeply about Ome Jan, he was so much more than a far away uncle.  it was beautiful to watch the connection they shared, as many cups of strong coffee were enjoyed while they discussed life together...she's feeling the loss, as are his three sweet children and grandchildren back in Holland.  today they celebrate his life and remember all the ways he touched theirs.  our thoughts and prayers are with Meindert, Henriette,Yolanda and their families today.  hugs from me to you...

on to sweet AJ.  each night before i hit the pillow i get my two youngest boys up to the bathroom to increase my personal odds of having uninterrupted sleep.  it's called strategy.  overall, there's less chance of running the washing machine at 3 AM, less chance of seeing one of them hovering over me with nothing but the "sense" of their presence jolting me from my state of blissful sleep.  yes, this routine works.  they both don't necessarily need to be woken, but at this point, the guaranteed success of a dry night is worth it.  plus, if you're bringing one, you might as well bring both.  so, Hudson walks there himself, but AJ often needs a guiding hand.  he set foot on the floor last night, eyes squinty and steps swerving...i held his hand.
AJ: "Mom, now i know how to count backwards with words."
Me: smiling...thinking that i'm sure gonna miss these sleepy revelations once these boys grow up..."Wow, how do you do that, AJ?  Count backwards with words?? Can you do it for me?"
AJ: now in the bathroom..."Well, i don't really want to, but i can go to the bathroom..."
Me: "Okay buddy, that's just fine...maybe in the morning."

moments of pure delight.  love them.

charmer

first, the back story...Layla has a brand new, fresh out of school teacher this year for grade five.  Mr. J. is married to a super sweet lady who babysat our crew for lots of years.  did i mention she's very brave??  :) she was always "a hit" when she came, bringing fun crafts and activities for the kids to do while Jeff and i were out trying to salvage our sanity enjoying our date without kids in tow.  then our babysitter grew up and met a fine young man.  he was fun and funny (and paid attention to the little cherubs) and the kids quickly decided the young couple was a perfect match.  E&J pretty quickly determined they were meant to be married, and on their wedding day Layla and Adam stood as their flower girl and ring bearer. 
fast forward to today.  Mr. J. finally graduated from many seemingly endless, gruelling years of juggling a family and school work, and today is the new, full-time grade 5/6 teacher at TCA.  such a happy surprise for miss Layla.  
well, let's just say Layla's interest in school is at an all time high.  there are daily "Mr. J." stories painstakingly recounted as i listen on, doing my very best to piece together the missing parts.  she shares riddles, gestures, funny comments, crazy moments, and on and on and on....get my drift? :)  Mr. J. dare not leave for a day or ever be sick, because then her sparkle dims a bit and school is just way more ordinary. 
so, Mr. J. has also openly shared with his class his passion for the Baltimore Ravens football team.  this is something that has stuck with her, and suddenly, our not-very-interested-in-football daughter is talking football and showing interest in the game.  not only that, however.  she's taken to marking her tests and assignments with messages much like the one below. 

this is her spelling test.  in the corner "Ravens Do Rock".  along the edge "Your teaching does too! Du-hh!"  oh my....super cute, for now at least.  hopefully Mr. J.'s good with sap, because i can just imagine his Christmas card...

this is curious...

...hmmm....not sure what to say....i never want to be overly critical of my children on this blog, but the reality is the picture below was, shall we say, jaw-dropping  somewhat surprising.  :)

i mean, really~ both Jeff and i stood and stared.  down at the paper, up at eachother, down at the paper, up at eachother.  and so it went.  our faces mirrored both confusion and astonishment.  could it be a mistake? or was this award really meant for our dear Hudson?

well, yes~ actually it was!  i had to ask his teacher how she came to this conclusion when choosing from an entire grade three class.  there are, after all, monthly character awards given at Hudson's school, and perhaps "Enthusiasm" or  "Compassion" or "Energetic" or "Funny Guy who can Dance" :) might have been better fits.  there are other suitable choices!  she shared the story that led to her decision.  apparently Hudson was seen walking the hallway after the others had come in the classroom.  his teacher asked him what he was doing.  he responded that he had been running down the hallway, which is not allowed, so he decided to turn around, go back to the end of the hall, and walk properly the second time.  she appreciated his honestly.  so, there you have it.  we'll celebrate the small victories, even if they sprout out of original disobedience!  just cracks me up.  never dull around here, that is for sure.

training

on this day, these guys were hard core.  running in the rain. covering longer distances than the previous day.  all preparation for the upcoming cross country meet in a week and a half.  i don't care (really i don't) if they finish last at the school event.  they have worked hard.  faithfully.  with endurance and perseverance.  not all runs have felt great, not all kilometres have passed quickly.  doesn't matter to us.  we're proud of the effort and the "stick-to-it-ness" we have seen.  Layla is the biggest fan of the sport.  the boys are still showing-up strong.

 

 

AJ has been training as well.  he just wasn't in this particular photo.  he's not old enough to compete at the meet, but he sure loves practicing with the bigger kids at the school.  he holds his own remarkably well.  must be that Ethiopian blood. 

proud of you Layla, Adam, Hudson and AJ.   

love Mom, your biggest fan!

this makes me smile~ installment #2!

couldn't resist posting AJ's first tests of grade one.  his first tests ever, actually!

 

 

so fun to see his work actually being done.  he's really doing it!!!  admittedly, he seems like a young grade one student.  and grade one is a big jump from senior kindergarten.  i had my doubts about whether he would be able to do this.  the structure, the academic level, the whole thing.  not that he isn't capable, just that he had such a slow start and he's been in "catch-up mode" since JK.  so, you can well imagine these tests he brought home in his backpack made me smile.  he was so happy to show me.  he was so genuinely proud of his results.  i love how he wrote the date on the math test.  precious. precious. precious.  now, if i could just freeze time......

my baby

how is it that my baby is six??  stepping out into life with the confidence of a "big kid".  he's loving grade one, blowing bubbles, reading first words, losing teeth, talking about the earth circling the sun :), running cross country, finally agreeing to practice riding his bike with no training wheels (thanks Hannah!) and just growing up.....waaayyyyyy tooooooo fast......sigh....

he woke on his birthday yesterday and walked into the kitchen.  daddy gave him birthday greetings and AJ matter-of-factly announced "i feel older".  it was funny.  and true.  he seems older.  he may still be physically tiny, but i can see the changes in his personality and the way he's embracing all the new opportunities that come with being six...

 

 

the "Batter Up" cake was AJ's choice, as he wishes to start baseball next summer just like his big brother Hudson.  it was super funny when the girls and i picked up the cake from a local grocery store bakery.  they'd misread the order form when putting the message on the cake top.  it read "Happy 6th Birthday BAJ".  Joelle noticed it first, and the flustered lady offered to fix it by covering the "B" with sprinkles.  we all still noticed the extra letter, but AJ was wonderfully oblivious.  even when we called him "BAJ" this weekend. :)

 

i know i say it often, maybe sometimes even as an important reminder for myself during the nuttiness of life.  there is no greater gift than our six children.  this sweet boy included.  from a little wood and mud house in the rural countryside of southern Ethiopia to my heart and our home.  only God...

happy birthday, Alemayehu Jeffrey!  you are so loved!

this makes me smile

i might turn the title above into a recurring theme on this blog.  where every so often i mention a moment, share a quote from my kids, or post a pic that literally made me smile.  it won't necessarily be the first week of every month (although, the "type A" in me would feel better doing it that way :)) or even just once a month.  it will randomly appear just when these life experiences come up and are worthy of sharing.  time is whizzing by, so verryyyyy fast.  i want to freeze frame the awesome memories that sometimes are overshadowed by the mundane or yucky. 

one such moment is seen in the pictures below.  Adam saved birthday money and scoured the Internet for the right bike that suited his wants/needs and, of course, budget.  we ordered the bike, tracked it online as it made its way to Port Huron, and last Friday we crossed the bridge to pick it up.  it came only partially assembled, but this "engineer-minded" child of mine welcomed the chance to finish building his new, burnt-orange BMX bike.

 

 

it was a pleasure to watch him. it made me smile. he wanted very little help from his dad, who offered, but instead preferred to systematically assemble his new treasure late into the evening. his sister was asked to hold the handle bars while they were secured in place. it was sweet to see.

 

happy riding, Adam! 

seven

this is one of those nights i soooo wish i had blogged years earlier than i started.  i wish i'd known to try.  i wish i could go back and relive the moments in sharper focus.  i blogged a bit about it last year, but not with the same details.  i decided they needed to be written.
this is a significant anniversary for our family.  this day.  and the next.  seven years ago Jeff and i were settling into a Miami hotel, with butterflies of anticipation (me, not Jeff~ which i know you know by now! :)) and emotion at the thought of stepping onto Haitian soil, the birth country of our son we were soon to meet.  wow, even now that brings back so many of the feelings that filled my mind during that time.  what had seemed like the longest two years ever had finally come to the homestretch.  the adoption journey was almost complete.  we were just a few short hours away from Hudson now, trying to sleep, with ocean waters separating us from this boy we'd fallen in love with from afar.  each month (while we waited to travel) we'd watched him grow up a little bit more, getting cuter and more expressive and healthier looking with each update.  the orphanage updates had gone from delightful and wonderful to somewhat painful as each month passed by.  we ached to have him home.  to take our own pictures of him.  to see his smile light up our family photos.  then finally, there was word.  the email from LaDawn (love this girl!) at GLA had the most amazing subject line~ "PACK YOUR BAGS!!!"  pack we had, and there we were now part way there, loaded with donations and baby items for our new son. 
waking the next day, September 11th, 2006 had its own range of emotions.  especially flying from a US airport where  9/11 remained at the forefront of so many American's thoughts.  we boarded our flight and made the final trek to Port au Prince.  Haiti was breathtaking and devastating, all at the same time.  truly a paradox of both, and i struggled to take it all in.  we slowly made our way up the mountain towards the orphanage, but not without incident.  first, the dilemma with the armed security guard appointed to safely get us from point A to B.  it didn't exactly go as planned, and there was legitimate concern outside of the airport about whether this buff, firearm-carrying Haitian was the right guy, or some impostor who spotted the "deer in the headlights" foreigners and wanted to snatch us for ransom.  shortly into the commute our fears were allayed when conversation with another occupant revealed he had been hired by GLA to get us safely to Hudson.  shortly after we had car trouble and had to wait for another vehicle to pick us up, all while still within the "less secure" part of PaP.  it made for a good story once safely back in Canada, but it was mildly stressful at the time. 
but then, the moment we pulled up to the mint green gates of God's Littlest Angels, the months of waiting and wondering and wishing and dreaming~ well, it all went away as i soaked in the moment and was fully present, fully aware of how precious this sweet experience was.  thankfully, even seven years later it remains clear in my mind.  i'm grateful for that.  Jeff and i got inside the compound and attempted to unload our luggage from the back of the SUV.  the GLA staff met us outside and said "no, no...let us do that...you go and meet your son."  wow....we stepped inside and there was this perfectly scrumptious baby, 19 months old but still quite small, sitting with LaDawn in pale green overalls over top of a cream t-shirt.  she said in Creole (Kreyol) something like"go see your mama and papa".  he toddled over and i scooped him up.  he was serious and subdued (imagine! :)) yet willing and sweet.  on LaDawn's recommendation Hudson even puckered up and kissed my cheek.  tears were flowing.  he looked at us like we were odd.  we settled into our simple room there at the orphanage and started the fun process of getting to know this beautiful child.  first bottle, first snuggle in the rocking chair, first prayers, first bath, first (of many) diaper change, etc...Hudson was sick at the time with a rattle in his chest and a fever.  it was a joy to give him lots of tender care and develop trust in those first days.  he was quick to attach and slowly let glimpses of his personality be revealed.  he was spunky and smiley and much like we know him to be today. 
fast forward seven years and it feels so good to look back.  it is important to remember where he came from, obstacles he's had to overcome, parts of him that are forever shaped by those earliest days. 
adopting Hudson was the start of something so transformation in my own personal life.  it was the discovery of a God-given passion for adoption and orphan care.  it was a journey that stretched my faith and sharpened my desire to give more of myself to those that simply need someone to care. 
i'm so happy to be Hudson's mom.  it is not always easy, let's be clear :), but seeing this child of mine hitting a ball during a baseball game, or playing with his little brother, or digging into a full plate of food i've prepared, well~ it is a beautiful thing.  i'm abundantly blessed our lives intersected.  i'm thankful beyond words.  can't wait to see how God will use this boy of big personality and intense emotions.  whatever his future holds, we'll walk it with him.  thankful for his adoption.

the sound of silence

i find myself humming the lyrics of this timeless Simon and Garfunkel classic this week....yes, the sound of silence is welcomed after a busy busy summer with lots of people coming and going, lots of happenings and celebrating and planning and doing. 
i could go on about the deeper, and even bittersweet thoughts of having my oldest turn sixteen and my youngest head off to grade one, full days every day.  i'm sure i'll hit those topics soon...but for now, for this moment, the silence is sweet.  i can hear myself think.  i can gather my busied thoughts.  i can breathe.  inhale.....exhale.....inhale.....exhale......ahhhhh...

summer recap

gotta love the lazy, hazy days of summer (although, to be honest, i wouldn't describe this summer as either lazy or hazy, but maybe more accurately~ lazier and warm).  pics to sum up a few cute memories...

 

 

above, Adam fishing in the river for fun with the rest of us watching from the rocks.  all the serious fishermen were out in their waders being all intense and focused.  Adam, totally casual and carefree, cast a few and quickly reeled in this nice sized silver bass.  the onlookers seemed stunned, one even asking what he was using for bait.  it was pretty cute...Adam then bravely brought the poor fish home and filleted it himself.  the next day he battered and fried his fish and we all enjoyed (a bit of a stretch for some) small bites of "the big catch".

the pic below is poor quality, but the memory will remain crystal clear for Hudson for some time, i'm sure...brave Grandpa Joe let Hud get in the driver's seat of the riding mower and Hudson "helped" haul off some wood and branches from an area at the back of our property.  this happened over the course of several days.  Hudson was thrilled.  completely sure he had arrived.  loving every minute of it.  sooo hoping that job went on all summer. :)

 

 

AJ mastered bubble-blowing.  in Hudson's basketball shoes.  yah, that probably helped.

 

 

lots of summer birthday parties...both our own and some cousins.  never too much cake for AJ.

 

party favours for some of Adam's friends.  gigantic jawbreakers.  crowd pleaser for the boys, not so much their parents. 

 

front yard badminton.  sad when some of my children can now actually beat me.

 

  for some reason, swimming in their "gitch" is extra fun for these two characters.

 

ahh...my dear Layla...she seems to have acquired my fondness for lists.  this whiteboard list just makes me smile.  sort of sums up the beauty of summer too.  her list reminds me a lot of my summers as a kid, she is a lot like me....wasn't being a kid the best?!?  i think so...

 

yep, summer is winding down.  already leaves are dropping in our swimming pool.  the nights are cooler, the crickets are loud and busy making their case that fall is just around the corner.  school supplies are being tucked into backpacks and we are starting to prepare for the early morning routines again.  it is all good.  the kids are ready.  summer has been nice, nothing grand or elaborate for us this year, yet still pretty sweet....for me, there was joy in the moments of fishing, beach time, ice cream trips, baseball games, camp fires with friends, reading, etc...so, we'll enjoy our last few days together and then we'll jump into September and see what comes next! 

boys and their bikes

Saturday afternoon, the day Adam turned 12, his wish was to take his bike to "the jumps" and play for a while. 

 

 

both he and Hudson love love love the adrenaline rush of this activity, which i'll never fully understand.  my girls enjoy it too, but not nearly to the same degree. 

these boys like speed and air and the wind and sun and sweat that seems to coincide with a trip to Canatara.  i try to understand it, but i honestly don't get it.  must be the extra "x" chromosome i have...

 

it gave me great delight to see Adam out there on his birthday, with the newly repaired biked tire (he fixed!) holding strong.  it was bliss. 

 

hope the videos and pics justly capture a small snapshot in time when we look back at this day.

the dress

today, on a bit of a whim, and between my personal "to-do" list, i ventured down to the chaotic storage room of our home, stepping over boxes, tools, weights, chairs, etc...there on the top shelf by baby gates and old framed pictures was the sought after rectangular box labeled "wedding dress".  this box has been opened only a few times in the nineteen years since it first returned from the dry cleaners, late 1994.  each time i wipe off the layer of dust, pull away the tape and lift the cardboard flaps, the same nostalgic feelings overtake me.  as i lift away the pink tissue paper i'm whisked away to another time, another day, another version of me.  the same feelings predictably return each time i unveil the dress..anticipation, excitement, joy...as i lift it gently from its place, i stare at the sequins and beading that made it special to me back when i first chose it in the bridal salon.  apart from some wrinkles, it really hasn't changed much since the day i slipped it on and walked the long aisle to meet my dashing groom. it's nearly as good as new~ which is great, because i'm pretty sure all my girls will want to wear it one day...ahem...i carried the box upstairs and snuck away to my walk-in closet.  i slipped it on while most of my crew was out in the backyard doing batting practice with Daddy.  Layla was milling around in the kitchen.  i stood for a moment, looking in the mirror at the much older version of the bride of '94.  i thought of all the reasons i have to feel blessed.  i looked at the white satin buttons that lined the zipper and marveled at the privilege of wearing this dress that signifies the beginning of so many years of vows kept~ each year holding timeless memories.  through highs and lows, days filled with mundane and extraordinary, this dress is the reminder of the promises we made before God and our wedding guests....for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and health....i "took in" the dress for a few private moments and then walked out to the kitchen and stopped Layla in her tracks.  she was both in awe and moderately concerned.  sort of wowed by its bling and disturbed by her mother's random behaviour.  i had even found the veil that was a wee bit flattened, but managed to secure it on my head to complete the visual throwback.  i asked Layla to carry my train so we could slowly and carefully walk to the backyard to show the rest of the family.  (sadly, Joelle is away at camp this week, and she'll be so disappointed she missed the occasion.)  Layla refused.  she thought it would just be too weird and wasn't going to be caught having the neighbours see her involved with such nonsense.  so, out i went on my own, only missing the musical processional and the bouquet of lilies, not to mention my dad on my arm.  he would have participated i'm sure, but he was working.  well, i nearly made it to the back gate when my mom pulled into the driveway and grinned in disbelief.  if she was disturbed, she hid it well.  she always loved the dress and was there when i chose it that day in Ballett's bridal shop.  she (my parents) paid for every cent of that dress, including the veil, jewelry, shoes and alterations.  there were never any outward signs of hesitation.  they just seemed happy to be able to do it, happy to see my joy, happy to witness our new beginning.  we hugged and talked at the fence for a few minutes, and by then the kids in the back had taken notice of the crazy lady in white.  they approached, inspected and enjoyed the oddness of the moment.  it really was fun, and at the very least a visual reminder of the significance of this day, this anniversary.  while life went on today with a birthday party, soccer, drop offs for soccer reffing, and we both agreed to delay our plans to celebrate, it was good for all of us to remember the way things began and the way they continue.  we were two young people smitten by each other and publicly pledging our love forever~ never ever imagining the whirlwind of life (plural) that was to come~yet here we are, still plugging along with the original foundations intact and holding strong.  we are thankful.  we are blessed. 
that was worth the trip to the storage room. 

dad's harvest

from this

 

 

to this

 

 

to this

 

 

man oh man, this garden of my father's is amazing!  the healthy goodness coming from it is delightful, not to mention a great savings on our monthly groceries.  this year alone, already we've had our fill of rhubarb, strawberries (oh, the strawberries!!), a few cherries, lettuce, cucumbers, zucchini, peppers, spinach, beans~ with lots more to come...this all translates to yummy salads, desserts, muffins, loafs, chili, sauces, snacks, smoothies, etc...Dad, we see you tirelessly working that plot of land and know it is a hobby, but also a labour of love.  we appreciate this annual harvest, even if it sometimes seems like i can't keep up to the sheer volume your garden produces.  we really do love it.  thanks so much!

aj quote...better left unsaid, but too funny to not mention...

i have permission to share this quote.  my dear mom agreed this was realllly funny, even when AJ's brutal honesty was directed at her....i guess his social discretion is still developing at five years old... we hope! :) 

AJ was sitting at the front of our house with my mom watching a couple of the older kids play badminton on the most impressive court (which almost needs a post of its own, considering the effort daddy has put into making it "real deal").  anyway, the conversation went something like this:

AJ: "Grandma, do you want to play badminton with me?"
Grandma: "Sure AJ, we can do that."
AJ: "I'll go easy on you Grandma."
Grandma: (smiling on the inside) "You'll go easy on me?  Why would you go easy on me?"
AJ: (without hesitation, and matter-of-factly) "Because you're old!"

for the record, as a child i loved my grandparents, my "oma and opa"...they were sweet and caring to me and loved when we spent time together.  but there would not have been a single day where it would have occurred to me to ask them to play badminton.  our kids are soooooo blessed to have two sets of active and healthy grandparents who are available and involved in their lives.  that is huge.  so, that being said, thanks for taking AJ's honest perception so well, Mom.  he may think you are old, but clearly he also thinks old is still fun.  that counts for something, right?

puppies! times eight!

we are in the midst of some puppy madness around here.  my mom's dog is a proud first-time-mom to eight (EIGHT!!) adorable little bundles of perfection.  if only puppies stayed as puppies! i'm not against a full-grown dog, but really, there's nothing like a teeny tiny puppy to melt you instantly.  right up there with newborn babies and kittens.  we are in awe of their sweetness and it's been such a treat for our kids to see and experience this miracle of new life while watching their journey of growth....so, all you really want are pictures anyway....soooo, here goes!

 

here, Mollie with her litter in the first few days...

 

don't squeeze too tight, AJ!

 

eat, play, sleep, eat, play, sleep....tough life...

 

all eight puppies are named.  grandma let the kids have a say in this.  we have a Frankie, Cruiser, Hank, Reuben, Stella, Juliette, Lucy, and Champ

 

it won't be easy for my crew to say goodbye in a few weeks when all eight puppies go to their new families.  but still, having this experience and memories of these furry friends is soooo worth it.. 

 

 

 had to throw in this one of me.  cuz i'm such a dog lover.  now it cannot be debated.  even the puppy seems to sense it.  clearly.