"you're gonna miss this"

i'm not wildly crazy about country music.  but there is this one song....it creates in me all sorts of emotions and i think the message is completely 100% accurate too....that's rare, hey?  i've sung along loudly through many bathroom cleaning moments.  i've also uttered the main line under my breath many times on challenging days with my little cherubs.  "you're gonna miss this....you're gonna miss this....you're gonna miss this." when Trace Adkins sings this tear jerker it gets me every single time.  honestly, i'm already missing parts.  there are certain steps of this journey called "parenthood" that have shifted in a really nice way as we've transitioned out of the "baby/toddler" stage~ and still other parts have gone by sooooo fast...

below is a captured moment that i'll truly miss terribly (sniff, sniff) in only a few short years....

my sweet Layla, whose names means "dark beauty", catching her beauty sleep with rollers in that she requested.  (i've slept like this and it isn't comfortable).  but she loves unrolling them in the morning and seeing the perfectly formed ringlets that bounce as she walks.  i'm gonna miss this....

i guess it's the thought that counts

hope so, cuz this was an interesting find under my smallest child's bed...

hmmm...the note reads, "Kisses for my mom.  Happy Mother's Day.  Love AJ"....it appeared i'd stumbled upon a Mother's Day gift that never made it to my hands (or mouth, for that matter).  i knew by the note that this had been wrapped Hershey's Kisses chocolates from my son and the thoughtful JK/SK teachers.  this isn't my first child who has gone through kindergarten, after all, so i sort of knew what to expect.  it struck me as a little odd when AJ didn't appear that Sunday morning a few weeks back with a small gift he'd made for me at school.  there was a sweet card, so that was great, and i didn't give it another thought.  until this morning when i made his bed and tidied his room and saw the evidence on the floor.  right there in glaring pink. we took a picture and then i decided to ask AJ about it.  here's how that went....
Me: "hey AJ, what is that pink paper and ribbon from?"
AJ: "oh, it's from the candy thing"...matter of factly
Me: "candy thing...well, where is the candy?"
AJ: "in our tummies"....picture the big eyes, serious expression.
Me: "tummies?  whose tummies?"
AJ: "me and Hudson."
Me: "was that for mommy?"
AJ: "yah...that's why it is our fault..." head tilted with apologetic squished up cheeks.

alrighty then.  a kid who can acknowledge his mistakes when confronted by them is a good thing, right?  now, the older brother eventually did the same, although not quite as forthcoming with the truth right from the start.  but he got there....never dull here, that much is true...and these are moments that make me thankful i have this little ol' blog...should be fun to look back on someday.  didn't need the chocolate anyway....

he is here

my dear husband is here

a stately looking building, three hours or so away.  lovely exterior, calm and tranquil.  a wee bit more intense inside...double hernia repair isn't a walk in the park, even though this facility has beautiful grounds to walk on that appear very "park-like"...

sooo looking forward to him returning here.

 
TLC from all of us awaits...see you soon, jeffrey!

mothers

another year, another mother's day.  another reminder of the amazing women that add colour and strength to my life.  i truly appreciate them more and more the further i get along this journey of being a mom myself.
my mother-in-law is fantastic.  i love the way she has invested in her family tirelessly for so many years.  she was a young mother who showed fierce commitment and dedication to her husband and three busy sons, and i'm the woman who lives every day with the wonderful man who was shaped by her care.  she is fun, laid back, and caring~ so is he!  he is also secure, grounded and very confident because of the stable presence of his mother (and father, but that's another day) during his formative years.  so grateful for this....and on top of it all, my children have a relationship with a grandma that they know loves them and cares about the details of their lives. 
my own mom is also a huge gift.  she faces every day with fortitude and grace, constantly giving of herself and modeling a wonderful example of love to her family in many ways.  i know now (oh yes i do...) how tricky it is to manage a home.  the balance of food prep, laundry, cleaning (or tidying as it seems to be more lately) homework, family time, friend time, extracurricular activities, spiritual nourishment, groceries, saving money, exercise, conflict management, etc....well~ it can be daunting at times.  my mom modeled it well.  i learned so much, just by watching, and later taking small steps, one-by-one...she shared with me her love of cooking and baking, her nurturing spirit, her compassionate heart and her spark for life.  unfortunately, for her, i didn't acquire her love of dogs or crafts of any sort.  i cannot quilt, make teddy bears, knit a stitch or sew a straight line, and have zero interest in doing so.  i'd rather sleep.  or have a root canal.  kidding...
thanks to these moms for the way they give generously and contribute to the function of our larger family.  means so much!!  we love you!
also, as always, i'm remembering the "first mothers" of my dear brown boys.  pausing again with mixed emotions at the huge stories of how they came to be here, in our home.  of how i came to be their mom.  this weekend i'm celebrating the single greatest gift these mothers gave my boys~ they chose life for them!  i shudder to think of how i would have felt in their circumstances, facing their challenges and life-changing decisions.  so thankful..
then, just when i think my heart might burst, i remember the crew that call me "mom"....how blessed am i???  that's it.  sums it up.  J, H, A, L, H and AJ~ you are my greatest joy!  many days my greatest stress too, but thankfully those days are balanced with the immense blessing to see you grow and live life with such a carefree existence...this makes the endless hours of work so worth it.  when i watch you, i remember my own blissful childhood and realize that it has truly come full circle....love you all to the moon and back!!
Happy Mother's Day!!

spring things

spring.....i love it so very much.  even as i type, the thunder rumbles in the background.  the birds sing.  the air is warm today.  spring has always been my favourite season and this year is no different. 

i love the sight of kids running by my window as i prepare supper.  i love the pink blossoms on the beautiful trees that line my driveway.  i love the hopping bunnies that chase eachother around the yard. 

i love the smell of line-dried clothes (take that, smart meter people!), the cool breeze from my open window at night, the green freshly-cut grass, the cute frog that's taken up permanent residence in our little pond and who finally cooperated for his first photo shoot....and on it goes. 

my only regret is that i always wish i was out more to enjoy it.  there is so much to keep up with inside the walls of this home, that honestly, it is tricky to tackle the outside, let alone to simply sit and enjoy the season....someday that will happen.  for now, i'll be thankful for the beauty around me, even if it is enjoyed most times through the panes of my recently washed windows (ugghh...glad that job is done).  one more thing i love...actually two....the fresh rhubarb my mom cut and shared from the garden, and my wonderful Hannah who took the raw rhubarb and baked it into my favourite muffin recipe....the sweet almond flavour balances the tart rhubarb in a delicious combination that has left just one remaining muffin on the counter from thirty that were made last evening....