last brown bag lunch

i know articles have been written about the "lasts" we face with our children. heart wrenching reminders i've sniffled my way through on more than one occasion...all about how we always mark the "first" milestones our children reach, such as their first tooth and first steps and first words.  rarely do we ever take notice of the "lasts", because most often time passes before we realize the event hasn't repeated itself again, and likely never will.  that is, until it dawns on us.  it's a sappy subject, to be sure.  who would even want to know it was the last time they were reading a bedtime story to their child, or washing their child's hair in the tub, or holding hands through the mall, or cutting up food on a dinner plate, or offering comfort after a scary dream.  of course i want to cherish each moment , each occasion (which i'm not always successful at), but i don't think i'd want to know each and every "last" as it occurred.  i'd be a mess of tears at least once a week with all the changes that happen around here on a regular basis.  nobody wants that.   

anyway, last week i happened to see Joelle grab her lunch to head out and catch the bus for her last school day, and it just kind of hit me! this was the very last time i would be making her brown bag lunch for school.  after fifteen years of sending her off with a lunch i'd prepared (i know it might surprise some~ the fact that i still make their lunches, but honestly, this is more for my mental sanity than anything.  type A, remember??  :) whatever works, right?), i realized out of the blue that this particular morning was her last.  her last ever school morning before post-secondary school changes everything.  i admit i felt nostalgic about the whole thing, but no tears or sadness yet.  more excited for her and the adventures ahead and baffled at how those years sped by...King's Kids nursery school is still so fresh in my mind.  she loved it...all those wet paintings that you tried so hard to keep off the car upholstery and pasta art and gooey glitter glue crafts with her own handwritten name in the corner......sigh.... 

i was grateful she cooperated for a picture.  i think the moment resonated with her as well.  happy to capture this "last".