so much has changed for me since becoming a mom 16 years ago. as a kid, and later a young adult, i thought i had a pretty good idea of what my own mom was living, experiencing, feeling. i really didn't. i couldn't have. i hadn't walked her walk, carried her load, felt her feelings. her story is still her own unique and personal story, yet now, as a mother too, i have a more accurate understanding of the highs and lows, the emotions, the heart wrenching love, the frustration and the elation of watching your children "live life" before your eyes. i wish i had known more then what i know now. and believe me, i have much more to learn still. ask my kids.
yes, the mothers in my life are amazing women. i admire their grit, their dedication, their "glue-like" effect on their families. i admire their crazy work ethic, their ability to lay out a beautiful meal and feed fifteen or more people with apparent ease and grace. i admire their humour, their love for children, their selfless care of their families. they are lovely women. they are loyal women. i'm so thankful to have watched them for so many years. i've said all this before, yet it's worth mention again. thanks for modeling awesomeness. happy mother's day to you!
to my own six kids. we are a unique crew. i openly admit (hopefully often enough to you all) that i haven't got this all figured out. i am not perfect. i fall short daily, sometimes hourly. i am living daily, trying by God's grace to show you real-life trust and faith, lived out moment by moment. i wish for you this....that your childhood (and far beyond) will be marked by clear knowledge of your mom's deep love for you. that much is not up for debate, dear ones. someday, if not now, i hope and pray you can see the love displayed in the little things, perhaps once you are doing the same things for your children someday. as i sort your closets and buy your socks, as i pack your lunch bags and style your hair, as i pray with you before bed and cook your requested breakfast, as i plan your birthdays and pack for trips, as i drive you here, there and everywhere~ i think of you with gratitude that i was given the charge to raise you. each and every one. not just those days, however. the other ones too~ when my answers are short or i lack patience to listen, when i'm too drained to really give my best to you and you feel slighted, when we argue or disagree, when i call out behaviours that are hard to accept, when my face looks stressed and you sense i'm preoccupied, when i need a break and i say so....well, even then~ i hope your confidence in my love is steadfast and sure. i pray this underlying confidence gives you security to grow and dream and spread your wings. believe it or not, i do want you to spread those wings and fly....so, to my six~ i'm happy to call myself a mom~ and a mom specifically to you. i'm certain it will forever be my highest calling in life. love love love you all!
and, just because i love this band, and i love this song. A Newsboys tribute to moms.
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